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This week I feel super happy though I'm on reservist and I've just been playing spiderman on ps5. I think it's because my goal for the week was just to complete the spiderman gamer and then rest. So somehow goals and happiness is created, and unhappiness is the gap between what you have and what you want. so when you choose want you want you're choosing your happiness but also your unhappiness. We must therefore be very careful in choosing what we want. This week i chose to relax and play/complete a game, I did that and I've had a super happy and contented week Me in the drafts, April 2024 I actually started this post about a year ago and never got around to writing it in full. When I wrote it, I was on reservist, able to take a break from the busyness of everyday life and work. I was able to play the new Spiderman game without feeling guilt, knowing that I'm "allowed" to take a break. And for someone with "itchy fingers" like me where I always have to be doing something productive, I was really happy. Why was that the case? I was quite burnt out from work and I was able to take a break from the hassle. Fundamentally, I was able to do what I wanted to do. What I want to do changes with time, and there are always things that I want to do. I think happiness is found in striking balance between things that you want to do for pleasure, and things that you want to do for improvement. The "harder" things, for lack of a better word. What makes me happy? My happy life consists of doing 5 overarching principles: Exercise Working towards a goal Reflection Relaxation alone Enjoyment with loved ones I try to construct my days/weeks around these principles, to fit time in for all aspects. More realistically, I try to plan out weeks or months for them. Some might say that it's a bit overkill to plan it out like that, but it works for me and it makes me happy. A happy life consists of happy years, happy weeks, happy days. This was just a reflection on my end of what makes me happy, and it might be different for you. Your relaxation activity might blend in with your working towards a goal. For me, it can mean brainrotting for 30 minutes on TikTok, YouTube, or something else. And that works for me. What works for you? I don't know. You need to figure it out yourself How to figure out what works for you? You've got to explore. Try lots of things. Meet new people. Pursue things you've always wanted. Travel. Say yes to everything. Do it enough times and you'll get a feel of what you like, and what you don't like. Write down what you like, and what you don't like. Once you feel ready, aggressively pursue the things you enjoy, and vehemently reject the things you don't enjoy. Take time out of the week or the day to carve out time for things you enjoy. You can't just go with the flow and let things happen to you, you've got to happen to things. You don't want to mindlessly follow the "flow" and one day wake up being like "wtf am I doing? Wtf have I done with my life? Am I happy?" As counter intuitive as it sounds, it was hard work to find out what makes me happy, but now I know where my happiness lies, so I can be laser focused and point towards it. Happiness is as simple as just doing what you want, but you've got to figure out what you want in the first place.

Hi, it's been a while (not that anyone is reading this) I started this personal website to document my thoughts and learnings and try to teach it to any readers but I somehow didn't manage to keep up with it. Why isn't this working out for me? It seems like a perennial problem that has plagued me since I started trying to do any content related thing (YouTube, Dropshipping, Instagram pages, etc), I was more worried about what people thought about what I was doing, rather than the actual doing of it. Yeah I wanted to do the thing well for my own sake, but I was more fixated on the outcome. "Will people read this? Will they like it if they do?" "When will this make money?" "Will people like this video?" I found that with my personal YouTube account, I enjoyed making videos most when I did it because I found it fun. This Website I started out this website as a way to develop my personal brand, to try and funnel people into reading my content, and then eventually possibly booking me for scheduled consulting and calls and whatever. Yes, I intended to help people but I also intended to profit off it somehow. I know, it's scummy to some extent. I think my desires were misaligned from the start. I put a lot of pressure on myself to make every post as good as it could be, with pictures, references, links, spending hours editing it, etc. And eventually, you guys only got to see 2 posts. The rest are in my drafts and may never be posted for a long time. Why? I was too focused on making it perfect because I had this incessant need for the posts to reach people. "Done is better than perfect" - Sheryl Sandberg Get going before you get good That's still one of my favourite quotes, and in theory it is completely true. But sometimes it's hard to bring yourself to get going. You feel pulled by this external need, rather than pushed by this internal desire. And that was what was missing in me. The internal desire. Along the way I forgot that I was doing this for the fun of it. Just to put something out there. I got so caught up in wanting the outcome that I was paralysed. It became a chore and a huge mental burden to churn out these posts, and ultimately I just never brought myself to do it. So what now? I'm going back to my "roots", making posts for the fun of it. This website is no longer going to be a structured and planned vessel to bring me to a particular outcome. It's going to be a place where I talk about whatever I want, whenever I want. The only one outcome I'm hoping, is to become a better writer. But I'll get going before I get good.

For the past 2 weeks or so, I've been taking a soft break from my work responsibilities. Having been called back to fulfil my reservist requirements, I took a foot off the gas pedal (which wasn't that hard down in the first place), and sat into the relaxation of not being fully obliged to show up at the office, to do the work that was required of me. Usually when I take a break from the work that needs to be done, I feel quite guilty but this time, I had a decent enough reason to do so (government mandated reasons to do so). It' quite hard to relax properly when you feel guilty for it, it's not mentally restorative but in this case, I found it quite rejuvenating, giving me time to not only spend more time with the people I love, but to also pursue things that I've been putting off, such as promotional stuff for the band or even playing the new spiderman game which my friend so generously lent me. While this may go against many self improvement principles of always working on yourself, having the discipline to do that hard work when you don't feel like it, it felt freeing, and it brought a thought to my mind. The Death of Socrates (1787) - Jacques Louis David The unexamined life is not worth living The quote is a well known aphorism by Socrates, the daddy philosopher himself. I interpret this statement as learning to live intentionally at it's core, to ensure that I am always on the right track, that I am keeping promises set out to myself. If you don't examine your life, how will you know if you're staying true to your goals, to your habits and your ambitions? I found that in the past 2 weeks where I've been "slacking" off , I felt incredibly happy though I was no longer living as intentionally as I would like. I was actually really enjoying myself. So I'd like to take a little spin on this quote with my own take. The unenjoyed life is not worth living Yes, you have to live your life with intention to live in a manner which you want, but if you don't stop to enjoy it every once in a while, what's the point? Intentionality and examination on one's life can go hand in hand with enjoyment too. Self improvement gurus and hustlers may tell you, "Examine your life, cut out the bullshit and aim directly towards you goal", but I think it can go beyond that to "cut out the bullshit that you don't enjoy, and aim to do things that you enjoy". We all strive for more and more. More money, more time, more attention, more, more more. But to what end? Never let your quest for more distract you from the beauty of enough. It's easy to get caught in the hedonic treadmill, yes. But on the other end of the spectrum there’s the problem of chasing more. I don’t know what we should call it. The improvement/more treadmill? Examine your life, look at what you're doing and ask if you're truly enjoying yourself. If you don't enjoy it, what's the point? Also something to keep in mind is that different people have different forms of enjoyment. So always keep an open mind when listening to a person. People like David Goggins or Alex Hormozi may love running/business respectively. They constantly get people telling them they should take a break or whatever, but what people don’t understand is that this isn’t work for them, this is play. Don’t let other people’s definition of enjoyment mar your own definition. Do what makes you happy, enjoy in the way you want to. At the end of the day it’s all about balance. Never go too hedonic and never get too “greedy”. My reservist is still ongoing right now, but I've managed to find time during this period to learn a new skill (I'm learning blender now to do some 3D animations for my band), and I'm also spending more time with my band doing music and promotional stuff. I've also had more time to spend with my girlfriend, which is something that I will always prioritize. I strongly believe that life is built around relationships, be it with your partner, your family or your friends.

In the middle of 2021, I finished my degree and started working at my dad's company. Two months into the job, I realized... I wasn't happy. I was always supposed to join the company and take over. But I never took the time to consider if that's what I truly wanted for myself. Suddenly, I had no motivation for anything. I felt listless, aimless, and started spiraling. I was having an existential crisis, and not the cute kind. The serious kind. The kind where I left work early to yell into a pillow, thinking to myself, "What's the point of it all?" It's a thought that comes up more commonly among everyone now, in an era where we are no longer looking to just survive, but to thrive – where we want to find reasons, meaning, and fulfillment in life. My existential crisis stemmed from a similar desire. I didn't know where this malaise came from, but at some point, I knew I couldn't just give in to it. So I picked myself up by doing things a little differently in my life. There's a lot of advice thrown around on how you should live your life. On my journey of fulfillment and self-discovery, I've practically tried them all. I know it's hard to find the motivation to do things when you're feeling down and at your very worst. That's why I aimed for easy, simple habits that don't take up too much time but definitely need some commitment. I have to caveat that this is what worked for me. I was not clinically depressed, but I was going through a really rough period where I was lost and misguided for the most part. If you have a serious mental health issue, it goes beyond these habits and you need to decide what's best for yourself. These are the four simple habits that I picked up when I was going through a depressive rut, and they helped me turned my life around. 1. Making my bed every morning Sounds dumb, but I’ll tell you why it worked. Full disclosure, I don’t do this as often any more. At this stage in my life, everything was kinda out of control. I was doing something that I was “supposed” to do, not because I wanted to do it, just being dragged around in every direction. But there was this thing in front of me. The first thing I saw when I woke up. My bed? Yes, but it was something more. It was opportunity. I could start taking control right there and then. It sounds silly, but the simple act of making your bed, putting it in order, could set you up to turn your whole outlook on life around. That's because confidence comes from evidence of competence. And this evidence comes from doing things. So when I made my bed, and made it with INTENTION, I sent a message to myself, a message that showed myself that I am capable of doing something, no matter how small, that I'm in control of the situation. So yes, my parents were right, so were yours. ACTION Take 5 minutes every morning to make your bed look presentable. It's a simple action, but when you realise what it represents, it can build your self confidence and self worth. 2. 15 minutes of Unrestricted Journaling Now this one is a little bit cliche, but I'm gonna tell you guys how I did it. If you're reading this, you most likely have a lot on your mind. It's hard to make sense of what goes on in your mind when you have it trapped all up in here (Point at brain). That's the idea of this action – you literally brain dump everything on your mind. When you do that, you're basically putting form to a clump of words. Imagine a ball of twine, messed up, coiled up, just a whole mess. It doesn't need to be gratitude journaling, just write about anything. Whatever is on your mind, set a timer for 15 minutes and brain dump it there. When you write freely, about whatever comes to mind, how your day was, how you're feeling, the annoying BMW driver on the highway, your grocery list, what you're basically doing is you're taking that ball of twine, that mess, and pulling the twine out. You're making sense of the mess. Putting it in order and giving form to the formless. By doing this, when you bring order to this mess, when you give it form, something more tangible than a mass of thoughts in your head, you start to make sense of it better. It's honestly a form of self-therapy. When we make sense of things, it's easier for us to move on from them. So, journal, write, type – I don't care. Just put form to what's in your mind. It's such an essential habit that I still journal almost every day, even at this point in my life. ACTION Get a journal. Every day, set aside 15 minutes before bed to write whatever comes to mind. If you're stuck, maybe some prompts might help such as: Today I... (write about what you did) I feel... (write about what you're feeling in the moment) I want to... (write about your desires) The idea behind all these prompts is to get going. Where it leads to doesn't matter. 3. Cold showers Legit. Don't click off. I know it may sound cliche, but hear me out. Another caveat – I don't do this anymore. But at the start, I did it basically every day for at least three months. There's a huge resurgence these days of people like Andrew Huberman talking about cold plunges and ice baths. Lots of research shows the benefits of cold exposure therapy, but I'm not here to talk about that. The main benefit, the main intention I had in mind, is slightly different. Imagine this: You're at your rock bottom, your lowest point, feeling useless, incompetent, whatever. Every situation is different, but I strongly believe that when you start to collect evidence of your competency, you start to feel better about yourself. You start to think, "Hey, maybe I'm not that useless." That's why I suggested making your bed in the morning. Cold showers are similar in that sense. Taking a cold shower is something that's arguably not fun nor comfortable at all. Trust me, I know. So when you conquer the cold shower, you can feel like you can conquer the world. The challenge, however, is that there's always a moment – the moment you stare at the running cold water in front of you, the moment between dryness and moisture – where you think, "I don't want to do this." Alex Banayan, author of "The Third Door," calls this "The Flinch." It's the in-the-moment, fight-or-flight, nervous response to doing something out of your comfort zone. The thing is, this muscle of "getting over the flinch" can be trained with conscious effort. When you learn to overcome it, you'll get better at it. So for the first month, it could be the moment before stepping under the running cold water. One day, it could be sending a cold email to a potential mentor, asking that girl out, talking to a stranger, or maybe even writing your first article. This is really one of the biggest benefits of the cold shower for me, and as cliché as it is, it really helped me build up my confidence in myself and my self-esteem. ACTION Don't overcomplicate it: get in the shower in the morning, step back from the water, turn the cold water on, count down "3, 2, 1," and step in. It's a trick I learned from the movie "Grown Ups," when Adam Sandler's kid wants to ask a girl out. 4. Technology Free Walks Steve Jobs did his best thinking while walking. According to his biography written by Walter Isaacson, he took most, if not all, of his one-on-one meetings on walks and often spent a lot of alone time walking. What I'm suggesting here is not just a walk, but a technology-free walk. In the world we live in, we tend to be so busy with all sorts of things that we don't simply go on walks anymore. There's never a need to. Similarly, we have instant access to some sort of stimulant – our phones are always in our pockets. Feeling bored? Just open Instagram and live vicariously through others. Feeling upset? Scroll TikTok, and you'll forget your problems. A technology-free walk means going on a walk for 15-30 minutes without your phone. That's all. Go out and observe your surroundings. No music, no podcasts, no audiobooks. There's a plethora of studies that support the benefits of walking, ranging from physical, cognitive, mental, and social advantages. Stanford research found that people who went on walks performed significantly better on tests that measure creative thinking during and after walks. Walking boosted creative thinking by an average of 60%, and the benefits were felt long after the walk itself. Researchers in Illinois have also found that children exhibited improved cognitive performance after 20 minutes of walking versus 20 minutes of sitting quietly. For me, I found the benefits of walking without my phone in the observation of everything around me. I was forced to slow down, to look at things in detail, to realize how nice it was to be outside, in nature, with people, and how much you could be missing out on in the world while stuck on your phone. In a world where everyone has access to you at every moment of every day, it's good to shut out some of that access. Our bodies were not made for constant stimulation, and years of overstimulating your brain will eventually take its toll. ACTION Put your phone aside, set a timer for 10 minutes, put on your walking shoes, and get out there. Once the 10 minute timer goes off, walk back the way you came. that's an easy 20 minute walk. It would help to batch this habit with something, for example do it once you come back from work, after dinner, the moment you wake up, etc. This is a trick called habit stacking (Credit to James Clear for this idea). Observe the world around you, let your mind wander, and rediscover the simple pleasure of a technology-free walk. It Starts With Your Intention Now obviously these are the actions that you take, but if you haven’t noticed already, the actions would be useless without the INTENTION behind the actions. And this goes without saying. Sometimes you want to laze around, scroll on your phone, that’s fine, too. I’m not saying that everything you do needs to have intention. But INTENTION is what makes your action effective and useful. The intentional execution of these practices and habits provide you with evidence of your competence and capabilities, and ultimately helps you build your confidence in yourself, starting you on the journey of being a better person. I have to caveat again that this is what worked for me, I was not clinically depressed and I was going through a rough period of my life. If your problems go beyond a cold shower or a walk, seek professional help and decide your best course of action. Here's a photo from my weekend to end off this post. Cute.

Hi, I'm Shasqil. I live in Singapore and I like to make videos on YouTube sometimes, and I make music with my band too. I help my dad run a small engineering business in the Oil & Gas Industry, and I am constantly seeking to improve myself physically and mentally. There's a lot of work that goes into running a business, a lot of self direction, and as an individual you need to have that clear thinking, that discipline to set goals and tasks for yourself. I used to be in a very dark place but I managed to pull myself out of it, and I'm hoping I can do the same for others in this dark place. Rock Bottom - The Start of It All When I first started my job, I was lost. Not only in terms of the work, but also in terms of life. I didn't know if I was doing what I wanted, I wasn't happy with how I looked, I was constantly anxious about god knows what, and just not in a very good mental state. I hit my rock bottom and had an existential crisis, and it was only then when I was open to the most learning and the most change. It was when I felt like my mind was unlocked, when I truly started living my life. The Climb - Making My Way Up Deciding that I had enough with the way I was was a turning point in my life for me. I didn't like who I was, so I had to become someone that I liked. I set the objective (who I wanted to be), evaluated where I was right now (who I am), and filled in the gaps. This meant going to the gym at 5.30am, meditating 30 minutes everyday, going to therapy every week, reading books, journaling every day... heck, I even did cold showers. I did everything I could in my power to just become someone I could be happy with. I started thinking clearly, and my body and mind started changing. I've learnt so much along this journey and I was finally taking control of my life. I wasn't just just letting life happen to me. Not anymore. Me hitting a 100kg deadlift in 2023 at the peak of my strength. Where I Am Now Right now I've settled in to my life. It's been slightly over 2 years since that moment, I still go to the gym, I still meditate once in a while, I still journal a decent amount, but I'm trying to be more focused on doing things. As time passes, your priority changes. I was obsessed with the gym at one point but I've reached a place where I'm quite happy with how I look, and I've developed my own mental frameworks and forms of thinking for myself. Obviously there's a lot more work to be done, but I'm quite happy with where I am right now. There are some things in life that you can change, and you should do everything in your power to change them if it means that much to you. Don't blame anyone but yourself; if there's something that can be done about your situation, you have to do it. Next Steps - The Future I was talking to a close friend of mine who was struggling with his personal life. Given that I was in a similar position before, I set aside some time to help him get these things in order. His mental state, his perception of events, his fitness, his finances. Since he was my good friend, I tailored everything to his current situation and constantly checked up on him to get updates on his progress. My friend in 2023, checking in on his progress with me I found great joy in doing those things because at the end of the day he told me how much it had helped him. Form learning about budgeting, to learning about exercises, just overall learning how to take control of his life. I felt an immense fulfilment from helping him out and that's a feeling that no words can capture. I figured that all I was doing was sharing what I did, what I learnt, and walking him through it. It felt like a "no brainer" to me since I've been through all these experiences for myself but I didn't realise how many people out there lack the education and even awareness for these things. So that's the main motivation behind this. I want to make posts where I share my learnings in a broad perspective and hopefully there are people out there who will find this information useful. I'm not an expert at anything. I'm just an amateur, stumbling through life, but aren't we all? I mean I'm just writing this article off the top of my head, and the only way to get good, is to get going. There are so many things that I want to do in this lifetime and this is one of them. So hi, I'm Shas. On this blog I'll just be sharing what I learnt from recent podcasts, videos, readings, and other thoughts I have. As long as I feel that whatever I put out could help at least 1 person in the world, I'm hitting that publish button. Be it business building advice, how to holistically improve yourself, or even my favourite workout routines. Stick around and I'm sure there's something you'll find useful. P.S - Don't forget to check out my YouTube page, where I make music videos (might venture into longform videos), and my band (I play bass).